Playlist: Ray of Sunshine

Thoughts Behind the Playlist

This playlist is filled with songs that, not to sound cliché, bring sunshine to my life. My mind can be an insanely dark place and it’s nice to have music that brings me out of that. The playlist is dynamic in that it changes with what music I’m feeling at the time. This week it contains Halsey, Alessia Cara, The Weeknd, and a few others. My favorite tune on the list is definitely “I Don’t Wanna Live Forever” by ZAYN and Taylor Swift because I’m Fifty Shades obsessed.

Halsey appears on several of my playlists. I love her voice and her lyrics. She’s incredible and her songs tend to hit me on a cellular level. Whether I’m sad, happy, whatever, her songs go with every mood I could possibly think of. Here lately, I’ve been numb. Very numb. I won’t delve into the details of why, because it’s extremely personal, but I’m numb. A good dose of Halsey, Calvin Harris, Ed Sheeran, and a few other incredible artists has helped with that.

 

Playlist
Halsey

Playlist: Ray of Sunshine

Here’s the playlist. I use Spotify for the majority of my music. By the way, Lady Gaga is also on a ton of my playlists as well. To each their own but, for me, she is GOALS. Everyone should find as much comfort in being who they are as she does. She gives zero fucks what anyone else thinks and that’s admirable as hell.

 

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Look of the Week: Everyday Glam

Look of the Week

I had a job interview, so I didn’t want my look to be too over the top. Thinking about it now, no makeup at all probably would have been just as well. While I feel like I look a bit more put-together, the women interviewing me might not have agreed. Being much old than me and not the type to wear makeup at all, they may have thought it to be over the top. I didn’t get the job.

That aside, I looked fabulous. In my own humble opinion, whether I got the job or not, I slayed. First impressions are everything, so I try to make sure that I am always putting the best version of myself out there. I try to stand out in the best way possible.

As always, the list of products used to create this look will be listed below the photo.

Here’s my Look of the Week for February 5th through the 11th:

Look of the Week

Products Used:

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Top 5: Things I Learned This Week

Lessons Learned

There are little unexpected lessons everywhere in life. We never know where they’ll come from or what exactly they’ll be. While always being beneficial, they aren’t always kind. I’d almost be willing to wager that the ones that are the most hurtful are the most important. These are the top 5 things that I learned this week. Some are silly, some are serious, but all of them were beneficial in some way.

1: Binge Watching

This particular lesson is my favorite out of everything I learned last week. I’ve been binge watching Pretty Little Liars over the last few weeks and this is my third time doing so. The second half of season seven and the series finale begins in April, so I’ve been trying to make sure I didn’t miss anything. Somehow, yes, I have managed to miss things and discover them upon re-watching. That’s not the lesson, though. The lesson is in what becomes of binge watching. To my own amusement, I dreamed, last week, that I was being chased by “A”. Seriously. I can’t even make that up. “A” was running after me down a dark street, black hoodie and all.

Binge watching causes dreams about whatever you’re watching.

By the way, #teamSparia and #teamHaleb.

Lessons

 

2: Overly-opinionated Friends

Even when someone is your friend, they’ll still throw their rude opinions at you. It doesn’t even matter how long you’ve been friends, because they’ll still do it. I have this friend. We’ve been friends since I we were 5 and 6 years old, respectively. She recently created an Instagram account and decided to follow me. After about ten minutes, she made a Facebook post. According to her post, she had been looking through a friend’s pictures. While looking through those pictures, she realized how incapable some women are of going even a day without wearing makeup. She voiced concerns over clogged pores.

First, I don’t wear makeup on my days off. I like to give my skin a break. Like a lot of other women, when it comes to days off, if it involves makeup, pants, or a bra, it isn’t happening. Period. So I do go without makeup. We don’t live close to each other, so she only sees my pictures and, as a result, my well-put-together face. Even if I did wear it everyday, I can’t begin to imagine how my clogged pores are impacting your life. Calm down, girl.

She went on to ask if women really felt better about better about themselves only after they put on their “clown faces”. She asked “Whatever happened to natural beauty?” Some women are absolutely flawless without their faces made up. All women, in my opinion, are beautiful without it. All of you. Incredibly beautiful. That doesn’t mean, however, that we shouldn’t wear makeup. Makeup is designed to ENHANCE natural beauty and boost confidence. I don’t know about you, but nothing makes me feel more confident than a well-put-together face and a great outfit. That’s when I am most comfortable.

Have your opinions about things, but don’t step on the toes of others with those opinions. If you don’t like wearing makeup, cool. Don’t wear it. It’s really uncool, though, to judge others and call them “clowns” for wearing it. Really uncool.

 

3: Wolves

I have this “friend” at work. I say it like that because he’s definitely a fake. He’s one of those people who brings and takes. He BRINGS gossip only to TAKE it. When he’s standing there badmouthing others to you, it’s only in an attempt to get you to talk bad about that person so he can take it to them. About as fake as the eyelashes I wear most days, he trash-talks everyone he knows, even those he considers his best friends. And yet, he’ll take anything you say, even if you said it out of anger, back to the mutual friend to whom you were talking about. I learned that the hard way. He’s worse than most girls; a true wolf in sheep’s clothing. More than that, he’s proof that you can’t trust anyone but yourself. This goes back to the image used for the binge-watching point.

Two can keep a secret if one of them is dead.

If you don’t want it repeated, don’t say it to anyone else. Period.

4: Depression

People have so many things that they use to get through the lower points of chronic depression. As a recovering “cutter”, I try to look for anything to focus my mind on something else. Cutting is something to which I never again want to resort. I have little people, my kids, watching me and that’s not something that I want to teach them. My most recent episode wasn’t even a year ago and it nearly cost me my husband. That was the turning point.

Since then, I have been looking for things to get me through the really tough times without resorting to self-harm. Music can be touch and go. I’m a very analytical person and music can make that much worse. It can cause me to become too trapped in my own head and that’s a dangerous place. Neil deGrasse Tyson has been one of my biggest inspirations for quite some time now, but I didn’t realize how amazing his lectures were for depression. While some would say it’s his voice that helps, I’d bet money on the content of his lectures. He reminds me to “keep looking up”.

And he does it with well-placed jokes.

5: Stay Humble

You probably believe that you’re really great at whatever it is that you’re do. You’d likely even say that you’re the best. While I believe that you’re great, “the best” is highly unlikely. I don’t mean that in a bad way either. While my job isn’t the best job on the planet, I really though I was doing great. In the last two years, I’ve rarely had a supervisor complain or tell me that I was flat out doing it wrong. Why would I suspect that I was wrong on a grand enough scale to warrant reprimanding?

That changed over the weekend. I received both verbal and written reprimand within a span of 24 hours. I learned that perhaps I’m not as good at my job as I thought I was. Perhaps I thought I was because, during two years of employment, I had never had anyone tell me I was doing it wrong. I now know that I was. Even though I question the necessity of reprimand twice in such a short amount of time, I realize that I still need to accept that I’m just not as good at what I do as I thought I was.

You may think you’re doing an awesome job, but you could be wrong. Stay humble, folks.

-xoxo

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